Live

I’ve spent most of my life

trying to sketch perfectly my favorite climbing  tree

many pencils have seen their end in this process

I’ve failed

many

many

 times

the branches are never strong enough

and the leaves just don’t smell right on paper.. .     .       .         .. . 

            For the last four years

I’ve bled on paper

trying to recreate a summer that

happened over 800 days ago in some form of art.

but

The laughter just doesn't sound right

and I can never put the way the sun touched my soul down on paper.

Trust me

tears have been shed.

            There was this horse

who left me too soon

he was white and he glided when he ran

I didn’t have enough time to get to know him

Sometimes I called him Captain

occasionally his name was Winter

I had hoped he would have become a Galileo

  my heart is still pierced

and no poetry has come from that ache.

            And because I’m a writer,

I wonder why some stories are impossible to put on paper.   

            Maybe we’re not always supposed to capture memories in picture form.

            Maybe we’re not supposed to document every heart ache

            Maybe some moments we eventually forget.

            Maybe there are some things so enchanting only our hearts can remember

N.D. Wilson said, “Humans are not intended for data storage (though we have the capacity). We are intended for living, for moving through a story”

            A few summers ago

I was so busy living I barely had time to write.

I don’t remember that whole summer,

but I do have some really stellar stories from it.

            I haven’t ever documented the rhythm of my heart beat

or the volume of my laugh.

            I have never written down

exactly how the Wisconsin river felt in my hair

but my heart understands completely

            I can’t draw a picture of my favorite climbing tree

but sometimes my hands remember the texture

and my ears hear my brothers laugh.

            This Life Is Meant To Be Lived

And I hope I feel the poetry I can’t write.

            This life needs to be spent.

7 things I've learned in my first 7 weeks of college.

At least, I think I've been in school seven weeks. Honestly, the weeks just happen, and I don't keep track. I really don't care though. Counting is not really my thing, and I really like the number seven.

1. I have time to read again. I was ridiculously involved in high school, and I sacrificed my love for reading to participate in every other activity possible. I have a good amount of free time now, and have enjoyed a few new reads. Stephen Kings book, On Writing, is a book I've discovered, and I LOVE IT!

2. There are more people like me out in this world. This gets me all sorts of excited. I was starting to doubt that I'd ever find tree climbing, obnoxious laughing, extra competitive, spontaneous personalities in this world. Thankfully, I was wrong, and I'm enjoying the new adventures, with new friends.

3. IF YOU DON'T HAVE A PARKING PASS DON'T PARK IN AMES! RIDE YOUR BIKE, HORSE, LONG BOARD, OR SCOOTER BUT DON'T YOU DARE PARK YOUR PRECIOUS CAR IN AMES YOU WILL GET A PARKING TICKET. I only know this from experience, and let's just say I didn't learn it the first time.

4. Sioux Falls, South Dakota is adorable. Labor day weekend, I took a road trip with a rad group of people to the city where one of my favorite people ( MARY RAES) attends college. I had a blast and a half, see you soon Margie ♥

5. My brothers hugs will always be my favorite. Perks of having a strong brother I guess. (don't let that get to your head, Dustin!)

6. If you're walking across a creek at Ledges, don't put your iphone in your shirt front pocket. It may jump out,  float down the stream, and never be found again. Let's just say Sam learned this the hard way. ;)

7. He is a good, good Father. My walk with Christ has been an adventure in college. I think I've learned more from Him than I have from all my teachers (not complaining). I'm excited to fall more in love with Him.